At one point or another, every family faces some big decisions. Some decisions for your family you’ll see coming in advance. Others you’ll need to make without warning. These big decisions can put a lot of stress on a marriage and a family. Should you stay in your current job, or chase a new career? Should you stay in your church, or try a different one? What school should your kids be in? Is this the right house? Should you stay or move? Do you need to upsize or downsize your car?
1. Don’t make the decision without both spouses’ full input and consideration.
When we make decisions without our spouse’s input, we are communicating that “I don’t value or need your opinion and perspective. I got this.”
Author Dr. Greg Smalley wrote about this in a post about the importance of working with your spouse to achieve wise decision-making together. One of his points is to create “pros and cons” lists as a couple.
2. Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know, but I’m going to research that.”
Sometimes we are reluctant to admit that we don’t know it all. When you’re trying to make healthy decisions for your marriage and family, it’s better to be humble enough to admit you don’t know something than to fake it. And don’t assume a hard question from your spouse is a personal attack. Be willing to hear those questions and then find some answers.
3. Seek wise counsel.
Needing to solve a financial decision? Trying to figure out a career choice issue? Why not find people who are wise and knowledgeable about those issues and get their counsel? Don’t just Google it and assume you’ve got all the facts.
4. Talk to the kids, especially if they’re older.
While kids do not necessarily get a vote on decisions, you might be well served to give them a voice. Hear what they have to say. They then will feel part of the process and may even have some good input.
5. Pray together about it.
In my post called The Key to a Close-Knit Family, I talked about how important it is for a family to pray together and to worship together. Praying together as a family about a big decision will help you to be in one accord and to rely on God for His wisdom.
Praying together as a family about a big decision will help you to be in one accord and to rely on God for His wisdom.
6. Don’t be too hasty to discount your “gut feeling” about things.
What many call “gut feelings” may be promptings from God to do or not do something. So we should heed those promptings as part of the decision-making process.
7. Bring the heart and the mind together.
It’s not uncommon for each one of us either to lean toward emotional decision-making or intellectual decision-making. There is great value in both of those perspectives. Don’t discount or discredit one over the other.
What are some other tips you’ve learned that help you make good decisions? Please share them in a comment below.