Remember senior class notables in high school? Most Athletic, Most Witty, Most School Spirit, Best All-Around, and Most Likely to Succeed were just a few of them. Well, I’m a bit embarrassed to tell you that they created a new category for me…”Most Flirtatious!”
Now, that’s not necessarily something to be proud of, but I am proud that I still like to flirt with my wife, Susan. Married people should flirt with each other…a lot!
Flirting, by definition, is playfully communicating sexual interest and attraction to someone. And flirting with our spouses can reap lots of benefits. Flirting can communicate, yet again, that we still find our spouse attractive and vice versa. It can create more intimacy with your spouse. Flirting in front of our kids, even though they may react with something like “that’s gross,” will reinforce a sense of love and stability at home as they see their parents showing a healthy desire to be with each other.
So, here are 8 playful, fun, and creative ways to flirt with your spouse:
- Leave a note for her (maybe on her pillow or the bathroom mirror) before you go on a trip. “I can’t wait to get back to see you!” may be something you’d like to say. Or, let her know you appreciate something specific about her, like “Thanks for taking care of so many details when I’m gone…you do a great job!”
- Leave a note on her car rear view mirror saying, “I’m jealous of this mirror because it’s looking at you.”
- Serve him practically in a surprising way. If you don’t normally cook, make him his favorite meal and have a candlelight dinner…just the two of you. For some spouses, it’s the simple acts of service that let them know you love them.
- Text him when you get up and when you go to bed to let him know he’s the first person on your mind and he’s your last thought of the day. I texted my wife, Susan, saying “You are awesome! I love you!” before we went to sleep even though she was right next to me in bed. I loved how it made her feel, and it surprised me just how much it mattered to her.
- Come up with something corny, but fun, to tell her or to email her, like “You must be overdue from the library because you’ve got FINE written all over you!” Or, “Can I have a fry to go with that shake?” (Search the internet sometimes for more lame or goofy ideas!)
- Turn on your favorite song on your smartphone and dance in the kitchen with him when he least expects it.
- Get dressed up, go outside, knock on the door, and ask her out for a date. The kids will really get a kick out of this one.
- Post a sincere, unexpected comment of praise for him on Facebook or Twitter. This has to be done in a humble way and should have substance to it. Don’t showboat, but do let the world know why he means so much to you.
There are many ways you can show your spouse you still “dig her” after all these years. These 7 Love Actions to Show Your Spouse may also help. Find what works for you, because not every idea that I shared here is going work for you, much less for my own wife! One final thought: even if your kids act grossed out, you’re not only showing them you are into their mom, but you’re also setting their expectations for how to be a healthy, flirtatious spouse someday.
If you have other ideas for how to flirt with your spouse, please share them with me in a comment below.
