I’m a big fan of date nights and weekends away in marriage. Susan and I still have those regular times together. Making a special effort to spend one-on-one time with your spouse tells your spouse that you treasure them.
Dinner and a stroll in the park or a bed-and-breakfast getaway can show your spouse they are important to you, and that’s good, but there are some simple things you can do every day to show them that they are immeasurably valuable. Minor moments are as important as grand gestures in strengthening your marriage.
Here are 7 T’s that, if practiced daily, will help your spouse know that they are treasured. They show that your heart is turned toward them.
1. Touch.
I’m not just talking about sexual intimacy, though that’s very important. I mean simple tenderness. A hug, a kiss, a touch on the arm as they pass in the hall communicates to your spouse that you have noticed them, that they matter. Reach for them when you are out together. There are 4 Benefits to Holding Your Spouse’s Hand.
2. Talk.
Words are the lifeblood of a good relationship. That means more than just swapping information, but sharing your life. Don’t just tell your spouse you had a bad day at work; be vulnerable, and invite them into your world by letting them know how it made you feel. And don’t forget to say “I love you” often. I tell my wife, Susan, this every single evening before we go to bed.
3. Text.
Again, not just shopping lists and reminders. It doesn’t take more than a few seconds to send a quick message of affection, encouragement, or even flirtation. Don’t know where to start? Guys, here are 10 Texts to Send Your Wife in the Next 10 Days. And ladies, 10 Texts to Send Your Husband in the Next 10 Days.
4. Time.
Even if it’s just a few minutes, give them your undivided attention. Put the phone down, switch the television off, make eye contact, and hold hands.
5. Tend.
Ask what you can do to make your spouse’s day a little easier; maybe by running an errand for them on your lunch break. Bring them coffee when they are sitting down. Give them a break by offering to tackle a chore for them tonight so they can have a few more minutes’ personal downtime. Trying to “out-serve” your spouse is part of The Best Marriage Advice I Ever Received.
6. Tidbits.
Don’t make everything about business when you talk, whether that’s a discussion about finances, a parenting issue, or even a deep discussion about an issue in your marriage. Lighten up sometimes. Share a joke, tell about something you read and found interesting—you are weaving your lives together through a web of joint knowledge, memories, and experiences.
7. Treats.
A little gift for no real reason can be as meaningful as a big birthday or Christmas present. It says they are worth celebrating simply because. Pick up their favorite chocolate on the way home or run them a bubble bath for them while you put the kids to bed.
Many of these small gestures are part of the five love languages about which relationship expert Gary Chapman has written so well- the different ways in which we receive and give love.
Wives, if you are wanting more ideas to romance your husbands, here are 41. Also, here are 10 compliments they want to hear. Need more inspiration? My wife, Susan, has a few quotes to help. Make every month feel like a summer romance.
If you were to add another T to this list, what would it be and why? Share your answer in a comment below.
