3 Truths to Remember When You’re Feeling Worthless

feeling worthless

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.” 

When Henry David Thoreau came to this conclusion, I’m afraid he may have gotten it right. So many people are desperate in their marriages and in other relationships. They are suffering in silence with feelings of inadequacy and failure and don’t know what to do about it.

So how do you battle these lies of worthlessness and begin to understand the truth that you are valuable? Here are 3 truths to remember when you’re feeling worthless.

1. You are valuable for who you are, not for what you do. You were created exclusively by God and for God. And because of that, you are valuable. There were no flaws in your design and no errors in your construction. You are hand-made, custom-designed, and fully loaded by God; and because of that, you have immeasurable worth.

2. You have gifts, embrace them. Every person has gifts or strengths. If you don’t know yours, I’d encourage you to ask five family members and friends this question, “In one or two words, what do you think is my single greatest strength?” They’ll all probably give you similar answers. Those answers identifying your area of giftedness will help you understand the truth that you are valuable and have a lot to offer your family and the world.

3. You weren’t meant to do this alone. If you’re constantly putting on a front that you have it all together, other people will start to believe that you really do have it all together. So, I challenge you to be honest with trusted friends and family. Share your struggles with them, and let them help carry your burdens and encourage you. Because the truth is you were never meant to do this alone.

We all struggle with feelings of worthlessness at one point or another in life. Instead of staying trapped in the mindset of thinking you have nothing to offer, remind yourself of these 3 important truths. If you feel that you’re in a season of struggling right now or if you’d like to encourage someone who is, feel free to leave a comment below.   

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • Spac

    That’s exactly how I feel
    I don’t have family or friends to rely on… I’m not happy in my marriage, we constantly argue and there’s no understanding anymore
    I don’t know what to do
    Where to turn, how to free myself from all this…

  • Liz


  • Jessica Berdechowski

    For the Love of my life Mark.

    You are valuable for who you are, not for what you do. But what you have done is so Great, you can not deny that is value too. Remember the gifts you gave to the world, and your family and with every single day that passes your way, embrace these memories. Your struggles are not your own because we can feel them too. I encourage you to let us carry you until you see your value.
    When you know your worth no one can make you feel worthless.
    Love Jess

  • Olga Gomez

    I feel so useless as every one thinks I’m a failure, I have six children, older live with my parents. Scince I lost a relationship that’s when I lost everything. havent had a home if our own Scince than. i have no family that’s supportive other than my kids. My two older sons are not going right paths. my parents want my children. Only there in there home I miss my kids soo much…I feel if I take the easy way out ….I won’t feel this pain

  • Elizabeth

    Olga – That’s not the answer, you know that. Your children need you! They need a whole you! Stop worrying about what others think and focus on taking care of yourself and your kids. Talk to God. Get your Bible out if you haven’t in a while. We weren’t designed to do this life alone. He wants to walk with you and help you. It’s gonna be okay…

  • J

    I feel worthless to the point of being a waste of space.

  • Heartlander

    Thank you so much for this post. I’m going through such a difficult time. Trying to get calmed down enough to try to get some sleep. I googled “feeling desperate any words of comfort” and this was one of the things that came up! God bless you for sharing this with the world. I really needed it!

  • Moejj

    I’m falling apart – inside. Wish. If only God didn’t let me happen/create me. No social life. Have a friend. Better than no friend. Only person I could ever talk to, my beloved Mom long gone. Sure. Jesus knows. Knows the boloney I go through. He cares. I know. Here I sit staring at the ceiling typing into the nowhereville internet. Gee, guess I must be something to come under attack like this, eh? My head feels like it’s been hit by a baseball bat, dizzy, major wave of worthlessness. Ride the wave it’ll all get better until it happens again. Icing on the cake, my beloved Kitty Barney, my little buddy I love so much, is sick, losing weight, not eating, praying like mad he be healed up. Barny and Kaliopae are all have to come home to. I can’t even afford to take my little Buddy to the vet. I have $17 until next Friday before I get paid. I blame myself. Career/wage faultered. Owe a buttload of taxes from years past due to roommates never paying me. Scared witless of the IRS catching up to me. Ah the love of money. No worries there – I hate it. Never have enough. I am a looser. Lost my hair. Missing my front tooth. So easy for anyone to say you have (cough) “gifts” have worth blah blah blah. I was the dimwith holding the door for everyone when self worth was handed out. Rapture or a speeding bus/bullet/train, then the hurt will be gone for good. No more pretending or telling myself I’m somebody to try and convince myself. Thought I would be married have a family have love by now. Nope. Not for this hombre. Guess that’s a blessing I can’t even afford to care for my Kitties. Don’t get me wrong. I am thankful. For a roof over my head. A job. Clothes on my back. Food on my plate. My beloved Kittehs. It could always be even worse, and not have the things I’m so thankful for. I listen to “I feel Invincible” by Skillet and I cry. Piece of work. Someone pray for me? Make the stupid stop? Can say this and *KNOW IT*. No I’ll never do something stupid to myself. Can DEFINITELY feel the Holy Spirit in that department. It’s almost cool & funny at the same time, in that I can feel the this IMMENSE strength that won’t allow it. Would be nice if the same would give me a clue, I feels so insanely stupid.

  • Sezakou .

    I want real companionship, not an invisible friend.

  • Virginia Mariposa Dale

    What you’ve been through is more than a maturing child should have to bear. Just reading your heartfelt story makes me feel like crying because I’m going through similar feelings, but at the advanced age of 74. I think the advice below, of making a day-by-day commitment to doing something, anything, that will make you feel better about yourself, is excellent advice. I’ve written novels and painted. I find that getting out my brushes and just making small improvements to a painting has helped me. I remember the joy I experienced before. I’m at a low spot, experiencing sleeplessness, depression even though I have a few friends. I’ve been an overachiever in many respects and at this advanced age I see many friends getting recognition whereas I’ve had some, I feel full of doubt and anxiety that my life has been extraordinary and I’ve fought the good fight over and over, but what is left for me? One day at a time with small steps forward and a good therapist!

  • you don’t even have to believe in god. just the fact you’re able to survive in the world makes you jolly special. because 98% of people ever born, are dead.

  • Ross

    I feel worthless,my girlfriend and best friend left me and I have no friends at all I feel really lonely and lost

  • Lisa

    Ross – I’m sorry you’ve found yourself in this lonely time. Things WILL get better. Ask God to bring some good people around you; people that could turn into some great friends. Find a place (soon) to volunteer that helps others (homeless shelter, food pantry, etc.). Serving others takes your mind off of yourself, helps you see the blessings you do have, and only requires a little time, your heart and your two hands! You WILL be appreciated.

  • Marcus

    I’ve been struggling for a while now. My side business closed leaving me with debt, my full time job cut my pay and I now work with someone who challenges me in a good way but it puts what I thought were my strengths into doubt that I’m actually even good at them. I can’t seem to accomplish any kind of personal success and it feels as though everything I did because I believed it was God’s will turns out to be a failure. Feels like my life is just 45 years of struggle, bad decisions and failures. How do I find the silver lining?? Is the life of some of us just supposed to be like this? Are some of us born to go through constant tough times as part if Gods will? I realize we all have different roles in God’s plan and we can never understand His will but sometimes I just feel cursed. Any advise?

  • GameraKillsGodzilla

    I have learned to love Jesus…but, I fear He doesn’t care much for me.

  • polysix

    Jesus doesn’t exist. Religion is a lie made up to control man. Dinosaurs were real. Use some research and stop using fairy tales to get through the day. It helps nobody but the truly weak and corruptible.

    Furthermore, religion of all kinds is at the centre of much of the “evil” actions in this world. Without zealots of all types we’d finally achieve a utopia, not based on religion, fairy tales or money but on care, love and honesty. ISIS love that people still believe in it, it’s what gives them their power, and christianity wasn’t much better through the years. Thanks for Xmas though, love it. 😉

  • Mickey

    I feel sorry for all the ignorance. I see plenty of claims that only science can prove our reality or human condition, but it’s that same science that proves that prayer and faith is beneficial to the human existence. Believing in God offers us hope and a way of life that obviously supersedes the one we as humans believe is worth living. If we would accept that there are some things that just cannot be explained and that not everything has a human explanation. I say ” human” because we are flawed and judgemental and place our self worth or value solely on achievements, economical position, appearance and education. As for myself faith in God has given me hope and joy that not one thing, person, or possession was able to provide. At my most desperate moments it has been prayer that has helped off the edge. I also learned that if you place your happiness or believe your happiness will be provided by someone you will always be searching. If we can learn anything from God and faith is that his love for us is unconditional no matter what we have or do not have . He loves us just because and teaches us to love ourselves and others in that same way. I encourage those who do not believe to search. If you have doubts ask as many questions you need, but at the end surrender your pride ,humble yourself and allow God to do his handy work. I speak from experience. I found God all by my lonesome out of desperation when nothing else worked and I felt there was no reason for me to continue to exist. Now years into my journey to find peace and purpose I no longer just “exist ” I live and that is what God and faith has given me. I still struggle everyday, but with the help of the Lord and the wonderful people that he has placed in my path i am making it. I live one day at a time and make the most of every moment and if all else fails I get on my knees. There is beauty in humbling yourself and not needing to prove to anyone that you are ” worth it” because God says you are priceless.

  • Christopher

    I feel worthless and would be better off dead.

  • Lisa

    I really don’t know what to do

  • Abe Lazure

    Every time somebody asks for real help, the religious mob flood them with their religious propaganda instead of actually helping them. They always prey on the most vulnerable among us because the happy, successful people would never buy into their superstitions.

  • James James

    I’ve been suffering this for a long time, now i want to kill myself

  • A Friend

    James – Please don’t. You are worth more than you know! Find someone to help, a place to volunteer. Helping someone else is great medicine! I’m praying for you!

  • R. V. Datmir

    Does the term “white elephant” mean anything to you? Perhaps instead of the same old cliche reassurances you’re offering, you could address those people whose gifts fall into that category.

    My name is […] and I am a white elephant.

  • CJ

    I do my best to not feel worthless and pray and read God’s word in the Bible often. It has been difficult to trust because I find myself doubting God’s goodness and love for me when I have lost 3 jobs in the past 5-plus years, almost all my friends have left and my wife has betrayed me, disconnected from me and – even though we are still together – she hasn’t said she has loved me, desired me, find me attractive and no longer kisses, hugs, holds hands or cuddles with me anymore.

    Hard to have confidence and self-worth when it feels like no one has your back and every day is a struggle at every level to survive!

  • Michael

    I agree. If feeling abandoned and lonely are only to be mocked by believing in the “Big Bang” then our feelings mean absolutely nothing and no one can ever comfort us. Jesus felt lonely and was abandoned by the very people He loved and said they loved Him. Only Jesus can comfort and really understand what we are going through in good times and in grief. After all, the Bible tells us that “…even when we are happy our hearts carry a never ending sorrow…” which is the result of a life of regrets and falling short of even our own expectations we put on our selves. I need Jesus. I need to know He loves me. So, even if I only have the historical writings (“stories”) to read to show me He loves me, well, it is enough for now. I love Jesus no matter how awful, abandoned or lonely I feel. I want to know, even in the smallest measure, what my Lord suffered for me! I love Jesus and will always love Him.