I have to confess: sometimes I find myself stuck. Really stuck. We all know that it’s human nature to have moments of selfishness. I know that after a particularly long or stressful day at work, I look forward to coming home and unwinding. Yet, this kind of mind-set keeps me stuck from looking beyond myself to the needs of my wife, Susan.
When our kids were younger, my wife was a stay-at-home-mom. While I was making presentations and working on projects, she was slaving over meals for the kids and cleaning up after a dog that couldn’t stop throwing up. And while not every day was this hectic for each of us, we certainly had our fair share of craziness. These daily stresses, big or small, left us both empty and exhausted. I quickly realized that it was up to me to step up my game when I came home from work and help her. Here are three ways I tried to serve Susan in that season of our life together:
- Be selfless instead of selfish: My first instinct when I get home from work may be to kick back on the couch and relax. Rather than be quick to do just that, I should ask myself, “How can I help my wife tonight?” Maybe I can tell her to take a break and let me set the table or clean up the living room. The point is that I need to never stop looking for ways to serve her and our family.
- Encourage her with words and actions: Instead of taking all of my wife’s hard work for granted, it’s important for me to encourage her constantly. I can tell her how much I appreciate her or even leave a little sticky note on her mirror thanking her for all she does.
- Romance her in a creative way: No matter how long we’ve been married, my wife still desires to feel beautiful. Maybe a night out on the town isn’t an option at the moment when we have screaming toddlers to take care of. However, it then becomes my responsibility as the leader in my marriage to serve her by coming up with creative dates we can enjoy together. Maybe we could have a movie night in, a picnic in the backyard, or even a bike ride around the neighborhood. It’s important that I continue to date my wife.
As our kids have gotten older, Susan has started working outside the home and joined me here at Family First. I’ve discovered that I can serve her in new ways since this change. For example, the other day I knew she had to finish a project and would be working a little late. I purposelessly left the office on time so I could get home and make dinner for her and the family. I’ve also focused more on helping with household chores that she now has piled on top of her office work, such as laundry and grocery shopping. Whatever your situation may be, take some time to consider how you can better serve your wife.
What are some creative ways you’ve served your spouse in different seasons of their life?