Putting Conflict to R.E.S.T.


No marriage is perfect. We all have conflict from time to time. Resolving conflict can be one of the biggest challenges in marriage.  When conflict goes unresolved, it causes tension and builds a wall between husband and wife.  When attempts at addressing conflict are unproductive or harsh, it can lead to resentment, discouragement and even bigger problems than you faced originally.

So, after you’ve cooled down and taken a break, how can you address conflict successfully in your marriage?  One way is to practice the R.E.S.T. method.

R – Review the Problem

Too often couples try to jump ahead to solving the problem even before they’ve clearly identified what the problem is.  So, sit down with your spouse and try to pinpoint the exact issue.

E – Evaluate Options

Now that you’ve nailed down the issue, discuss the different options for solving it. Come up with solutions that can be measured.  Make it a real brainstorming session where you just say whatever comes to mind.

S – Solving the Problem

This is where you select an option and put it into action.  During the selection process, be open to compromise.  Remember, if things don’t work out you’ll have an opportunity later to readdress the issue and options.

T – Track Your Progress

Don’t skip this step unless you’re making a decision on a one-time event or occurrence like where to go for vacation.  In most cases, you’ll want to set a specific time to sit down and talk about how your solution is working.

For a little more help just click on our R.E.S.T. Worksheet below to download your copy…


Until next time,


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