How Being Sarcastic Will Hurt Your Family

what does sarcasm mean

Do you want your family to trust you? One of the best ways to build that trust is to say what you mean and mean what you say. Words are powerful, for good and bad. But perhaps no words are more damaging and trust-destroying than sharp, cutting words dripping with the ooze of sarcasm. What does sarcasm mean for families? Nothing but trouble.

But sarcasm can be worse than direct, blunt meanness. Why? Because sarcasm is basically meanness that’s cloaked in an insincere complement. Here are 5 ways being sarcastic will hurt your family.

Stop Trying to Achieve Work Life Balance!

work life balance

Nik Wallenda made history in June 2013 when he became the first man to cross a Grand Canyon-area gorge on a tightrope. But while admirable, his achievement is not the inspirational work-life balance lesson some people suggest. Why? Because it’s just not possible to sustain that kind of balance for a long time.

It took every ounce of the seventh-generation member of the famous Flying Wallendas high-wire family’s concentration, skill, and determination to complete the 22-minute crossing, 1,500 feet above the Little Colorado River Gorge. His walk was a continual series of careful adjustments, taking into account the wind, the weight of his bar, and the movement of the wire beneath his feet.

That kind of balance required all his training and all his talent, a level of intensity that can only be channeled into a specific goal. Few would even consider attempting it—yet many people are drawn to try a different kind of high-wire act that I believe is equally beyond them.

I’m talking about the work-life balance that we are so often told to pursue; the search term brings up almost 200,000 Google results. The idea is that if we try hard enough, we can keep everything in our life in good order and perfect harmony. We meet all our work obligations and responsibilities but never miss a family dinner or one of the kids’ games. No one is ever disappointed, and everything works out just fine.

It’s a worthy goal to aspire to; but let’s be honest, we’re not going to achieve it. Life just isn’t like that. There are too many factors beyond our control. Don’t forget Nik wouldn’t have stepped out if the conditions had been too bad. But you can’t always say “No” to things just because the timing isn’t the best, right? Work goals still have to be met. Children must be fed and cared for.

For many, the concept of work-life balance has become unhelpful. A general principle that should be encouraging has become a cast-iron rule that too often leaves people feeling frustrated, failures, guilty, or inadequate. It can also drive a wedge between couples who feel the other isn’t pulling their weight as they should.

Even the words of wisdom from the ancient Book of Ecclesiastes remind us that we can’t always hold things in perfect tension. “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven,” it declares. “A time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted… a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up… a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together… a time to get, and a time to lose.” So let me be the one to give you permission to live life off-balance.

I’m not saying you should not be concerned about being the best worker, husband or wife, and parent that you can, all at the same time. But sometimes those demands don’t all line up equally the same. Here are five things to keep in mind as you live off-balance.

7 Keys to Marriage Maintenance

marriage maintenance

Car ownership can be a thrill, an investment, a hobby, an obsession, or even just a necessity. But owning a car also means learning how to maintain the car to keep it running well for a long time. In the same way, it’s critical to regularly maintain your marriage so it will last for life. So here are some keys to marriage maintenance.

1. Marriage needs regular maintenance on the basics.

Every vehicle needs the fluids checked, the oil changed, and the tires aired up from time to time. A car that gets that attention can last a long time. But a vehicle that is neglected in these basics is headed for a short life because of the cumulative wear and tear.

Your marriage needs regular maintenance as well. You can’t just tell your spouse “I said ‘I love you’ when we got married, and I’ll let you know if anything changes!” Keeping up on the basics of love, patience, kindness, communication, and intimacy will help your marriage handle the wear and tear of the mileage, too.

2. Be sure your security system is working.

Thieves are everywhere. Car dealers have increasingly complicated security systems in place to reassure a new owner. And stickers and lights are intended to discourage would-be criminals.

Similarly, you need to maintain careful security over your marriage. You can’t assume no one will ever try to steal the heart and affection of your spouse either. Today’s culture is rife with seduction of many kinds. A protected marriage projects a strength that warns others not to waste their time even trying. Here are the rest of the keys to maintaining your marriage.