It’s the first football game of the season. Clean uniforms, fresh grass, shiny cleats, and a leather ball. The quarterback barks out the signals, takes the snap, and drops back into shotgun. Suddenly, he drops the ball. So what does he do? Does he just watch the ball sit on the ground? Does he ignore it and walk off the field? No, he quickly recovers it, or, better yet, picks it up and keeps going!
When it comes to fumbling in our relationships with our kids, we can learn a lot from watching football. When we drop the ball, we need to quickly pick it up and move the ball down the field in our relationship with our child.
Having raised five children, I’ve fumbled on a number of occasions. Of course, I try to learn from my mistakes, but I’ve found it better to avoid those mistakes before they occur. Here are some things you can do to avoid those fumbles with your kids:
1. Keep Your Commitments.
When you commit to doing something with your child…bike riding, a trip to the park, or throwing the ball in the backyard…be sure to put it on your calendar as a very important appointment. Then, keep the appointment and be on time. Doing so will send a signal to your child that they are important.
How to Teach Integrity to Your Kids
2. Speak the Truth.
In a recent blog post, I shared: “No matter what, my children know that I will always speak the truth to them. If they ask me a question, they will get the truth. They can trust what I say because of my track record over time. Consistent truth-telling is key to staying connected relationally.”
3. Check Your Emotions.
When tackling a tough topic with your teen, check your emotions first. If you are angry or anxious, perhaps you should hold off on talking to them. One of the quickest ways to fumble the relational ball with our kids is to approach them in an emotionally charged way. Once your emotions are in check, keep them in check. If your child makes an annoying or condescending comment in an attempt to engage you, don’t take the bait. Stay calm, cool, and collected.
Four C’s for Communicating with Your Teen
4. Honor Your Children.
Speak respectfully to them and to others about them. Discipline them with gentleness.
Why You Must Honor Your Children
What do you do to avoid fumbling the parenting ball?
