3 Things Women Must Know About Men

3 min read

 

There are 3 things that women must know about men. In her book, For Women Only, author Shaunti Feldhahn goes into great depth addressing these three, and a few other things women need to know.

Women must know that:

1.   Men want respect.

Just as we must love unconditionally, we must also respect unconditionally.  That means, contrary to what we often hear, a man should not have to earn the respect of his wife; she should show respect to him no matter what.

Here are a couple of specific ways a woman can show respect to a man. First, respect his judgment.  A man needs his woman to value and trust his opinions and decisions, even if they prove to be wrong sometimes. That means not constantly questioning his knowledge with a “why do you say that?” or challenging his decisions by asking, “Why don’t you just stop and get directions?”  Second, respect his abilities.  A man doesn’t want to hear something like, “You’re not a handyman, I’ll call the plumber” or “Sports isn’t your thing, I’ll ask John to teach him how to throw the football.”  A guy doesn’t want to be shot down even before he gives it a chance.  A man needs his woman to have confidence in what he does, whether it’s fixing the kitchen sink or changing a diaper.  A man wants to hear, “Good work, honey. You’re the man!”

Respect should be demonstrated not just privately to your husband, but also in front of your children, friends and others as well.  When your husband asks your child to take out the garbage, back him up by telling your child, “Let’s do what dad asked us to do right now, please.”  When you’re out to dinner with another couple, let them know how your awesome husband surprised you for your anniversary.

2.   Men want affirmation.

If a man doesn’t think that his woman thinks he’s the greatest, he will seek affirmation elsewhere.  He may spend more hours at work where he receives more applause, awards and accolades.  He may look for another female to validate him and praise him.  He may spend his time watching or playing sports in hopes that his competitive spirit will be satisfied by victory in the game.

On the other hand, if he hears the words, “I really admire you for reaching out to John and helping him.  He’s had a tough time since he lost his job.” he will be uplifted and inspired.  “The kids and I really appreciate how hard you work for our family.  I know you’d rather be at home more.” would put wind beneath a husband’s wings.  When a man is affirmed, it’s like a strong wind blowing into his sails.  If a man feels his wife believes in him, he will excel and do better in other areas of life.

3.   Men want to be wanted.

Sure, we all know that men want sex…but men also want to be wanted.  Sex with an emotionally uninvolved or reluctant wife, who only accommodates her husband to keep him “satisfied,” is not enough.  A man wants to know that his wife wants and desires him. Having this kind of mutually enjoyable sex life is not only physically satisfying to your man, but also emotionally fulfilling to him.  When a man knows he is wanted in this way, it’s like his wife saying to him, “You are more important to me than anything in the world.”  This confidence building in the marriage relationship also spills over to a confident man in other areas of life.

Here are the 5 Things Men Must Know about Women.

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